It's been a while... hasn't it?

So! I haven't written in a while. Why? Well, I am not sure how to put all of this down in words. So, I guess I will just start from the beginning.

Feb. 8, after we returned from our adventure to Bishop's Castle, I took a pregnancy test. It was positive!! We were elated and started calling everyone. I got an official pregnancy test at my doctors office and I indeed was pregnant.

Fast forward to Valentine's Day. James and I spent the day hanging out. He got me a new recliner for V-day. We had a romantic spaghetti dinner at home and watched a movie. It was wonderful. Then, I started to get cramps. Bad cramps. We called the nurse line for my clinic and they said if the cramps don't go away in 20 minutes to call them back. Well, they went away, then came back. They kept getting stronger and stronger, but I just figured it was really bad indigestion.

I tried to sleep that night, but was up in the bathroom the majority of the night. It was painful to move too. If I just stayed in one place I felt ok. By 8:00 in the morning on Feb. 15 I was in so much pain that I had James call the nurse line again. This time they told us to get to the clinic as soon as possible for an ultrasound.

We got there, waited for about 5 minutes, which were the longest and most painful 5 minutes of my life. We were called in and the ultrasound commenced. They spotted what they called a "mass" in my left fallopian tube, and some "free fluid." They wanted me to go get my blood drawn and they called the doctor on call to come in. It took them 3 pokes to get my blood to flow. I must have been extremely dehydrated.

They took me back in to do another ultrasound, this time with the doctor there watching and letting us know what was wrong. He wasn't sure, but he said the "free fluid" was blood that was pooling in my abdomen and the mass was a possible ectopic (tubal) pregnancy. Our elation about being pregnant crashed and turned to fear and disappointment.

They wouldn't let me go home, they had to operate! They took me up to the surgery center and poked me more. 16 times to be exact. They couldn't find a vein for the IV. They almost resorted to putting one in my foot but they found one finally! I was in so much pain it was all I could do to feel all the pokes.

I was given some meds that made me loopy and they wheeled me into the operating room. They did a laproscopy surgery on my. I have 3 tiny incisions on my belly now. I don't remember anything until I came to back outside the operating room.

James was there and I asked him what happened and he told me it was an ectopic pregnancy and they had to take it and the bleeding was stopped. MY HEART BROKE! We had lost a baby.

It took me about an hour to recover enough from the surgery to be able to get up and get dressed. They sent me home and I went straight to our couch where I stayed for the next week. My mom was kind enough to come down and take care of me while James was at work. They doctor told me to stay off of my feet at least until Wednesday of that week, but I was still pretty sore and nauseous from the antibiotic and pain meds that they prescribed to me that I didn't go to work at all that week. Mom left Thursday and I spent Friday on my own. Thank you Mom for all the help and everything you did!!!

We do have good news though. I am still pregnant. It has been confirmed. More information to come on that after we have another doctor appointment. But for now, you can just know that one of our babies is in heaven and we are hoping for the best and praying for God's guidance and blessing with this pregnancy!